I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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