You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
