There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I'm at about main and main street
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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