The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist