i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
he was CRYING into my vagina
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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