i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
