this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
