i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
