I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
