I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
