my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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