everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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