To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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