Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
