I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
