So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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