somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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