IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
