last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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