Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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