That's intense
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
