My nipple is on Facebook.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
