i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
