with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
