Sry I called you an 8
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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