Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
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