That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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