you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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