I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
