love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
