I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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