What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
