Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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