My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome