Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
