Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
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