yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize