Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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