cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize