i think my mom watched the whole time
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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