suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
