I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
