speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!