you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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