Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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