i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
