would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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