do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
