And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
