i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he fucked my hip out of place.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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