doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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