This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
